- Anxiety Blogs
Do you have an elephant in your room?
The elephant is something you don’t want to admit to, but it is always there. The wretched thing messes with your confidence and it needs to be acknowledged and loved.
My elephant is the consequences of thin bones. Now I have a very visible consequence - a walker which I find very embarrassing to admit to. I am fine walking around for short distances, but I need it for rough footpaths and longer distances.
As a child I was allergic to cows’ milk and my mother couldn’t feed me on wartime rations. I developed rickets and wore calipers to my waist until I was 5.
I can clearly remember aged 5, being in the front garden when a group of primary school boys walked past and laughed and jeered at “iron legs” then Mum telling me to go inside and never to let anyone see me. Do you think that did a lot for my self-confidence over the years? I’m okay with confidence now except around my elephant.
I still have thin bones and have broken vertebrae 4 times plus multiple ribs and I shattered an arm, so now I use the walker and keep strong by going to a personal trainer twice a week and walking my dog daily... that’s why I got her, although really I love her cuddles.
I have never let my physical issues limit me.
And sometimes foolishly, I don’t let on that I have limits. About 10 days after I had a double mastectomy to treat breast cancer I was working at a client’s chemical factory when I was asked to climb a ladder up the outside of a large building.
I had not told the client I had a major illness and surgery, that was also an elephant. I used to keep a zoo full of these elephants in the room. I was supposed to be resting at home and not doing anything strenuous.
Never let anyone see my weakness was what I had learned aged 5.
Shortly after that I started retraining so that I could change my life to one where I travelled less and became less physically active. I realised I had lived with PTSD for most of my life since my early childhood under a war. And that had been compounded over the years by bullying and three abusive marriages.
I retrained first in NLP then Hypnotherapy plus a lot of shorter mental health, psychotherapy and trauma courses.
Most importantly I discovered how to heal myself and to let those deep memories go. Some things can’t be unseen and unheard, but you can let the pain go.
Anxiety and fear are not your fault...
...but it is YOUR responsibility to heal.
While I was working as a quality systems consultant, I learned that I am very good at discovering the root causes of problems and putting in systems so that they don’t keep happening.
I’m also good at teaching others to do this. This transfers directly from working with businesses to working with clients with problems, which is the basis of what I do now and what I did to heal myself.
What are your deep issues? Do you know why they are a problem; do they still harm you?
If you need help please contact me. I would love to help you access and resolve your deep stressful and traumatic memories so that you become the stronger and wiser person you were meant to be.
I have turned what I did to help me recover into a simple step by step process you can either do with me face to face or by using my online Escape from Anxiety program.
OH, and until Sept 25th if you type OOPS into the coupon space you will get this for half price because I made a typing error on my website. It costs a whole lot less. Only $28.50 a month for 10 months or $235 if you pay up front. To get this price, you must use the word OOPS as a coupon and sign up before 5pm on Saturday 25th.